Every year my doctor has a Candlelight Ceremony for surviors and for those who have lost their battle with Gyno Cancers. Last year I didn't go.
I didn't go, because I felt guilty. Guilty for still being here, while my Aunt isn't.
I don't like the word survivor when it comes to cancer. It's misleading. Just because a person had cancer and is still alive, doesn't mean they are going to survive. And because a person doesn't survive, doesn't mean they are not a survivor.
A survivor is, "one who lives through affliction". My Aunt lived through affliction for much longer than I did. If anyone is a survivor, it is she.
This year, I'm going to go. For my Aunt, who is a survivor.
Tom has never gone to the Ceremony. I have to admit, I've never really encouraged him to go. He lost his Mom to cancer. And I thought it would be just too sad. But, now I think, it's a good thing for him to go to. Because, it will give him a different understanding as to what his Mom went through. And to let him see, he is not alone in his loss.
It's hard. No matter what it's hard.
But, after work today Tom, my Mom and I will go. For us, for my Aunt for all my teal ribbon wearing sisters. And for those sisters, that can't go.
We are all survivors.